When I was pregnant, everyone had their own stories to share about the experience of motherhood. I listened eagerly, trying to imagine the unimaginable… but even with various anecdotes and advice, the same message came through: you will learn to love like you’ve never loved before.
I would definitely say that’s true, but the concept hasn’t really fleshed out like I thought it would. The moment Noah was placed into my arms, I remember feeling relieved, thankful, in awe… love? Yes. But it was a different kind of love. It was love that didn’t know a thing about this baby, other than the fact that we shared the same life, breath, heartbeat. He was a tiny and precious creature that I wanted to protect.
As the months passed and Noah developed more and more personality, I began to love him into a fullness that was unimaginable to me on the day we met. He laughs, he makes decisions, and he responds to us in ways unlike others. He is a unique, AWESOME creature. And here’s where I come to the place other mothers were before: where I can’t explain how I feel, because it’s a completely new and unique experience for me. Why does the English language only have a single word for love?!
Please don’t read this and think all days are filled with musings on warm fuzzies– I definitely have days where there are tears, fevers, frustrations, and an all-around lack of patience. But isn’t that the same in all our relationships? What profound grace that we have been given one another to share this fragile life.